Just don’t say anything to him about his hair. He’s not fooling anyone, but we let him pretend anyway.]]>
Special thanks to my incredible Mom, Karen, for the name and the idea!
Ingredients: Eggs, sugar, butter, flour, salt, baking powder, almond extract–not necessarily in that order]]>
Again, if you have a special request, make it. If it turns out that it’s awesome, you get to name it.
Ingredients: Eggs, vanilla, 5th Avenue candy bars, sugar, dark brown sugar, light brown sugar, French’s Potato Sticks, butter, flour, salt, baking soda, baking powder–not necessarily in that order]]>
Karen also purchased a tray of Satay Peanut Sauce cookies for her co-workers because they hate her. That’s what she said. Apparently, going three minutes too long makes your producer want to behead you with a flaming sword of punctuality and stuff a stopwatch down your gaping neck hole. But he can be soothed with a cookie.
That’s broadcasting, for you.
Cookies. I mean, he’ll be getting to have some cookies. Tonight. After a sensible dinner…Oh, never mind.
Whatever. Great taste just has a way of gravitating to other things around here. Thanks again, Karen!]]>
Then they were messily devoured by the shower guests.]]>
The roses were a different matter.
The first attempts melted in the oven into, I swear to God, dog turds. If you ever need realistic edible dog turds delivered to a frienemy, I’ve got what you need. Then I figured out that if I put the delicate, little suckers into parchment and used shot glasses to hold them while they baked, they’d hold their shape better.
And hold their shape they did!
Unfortunately, they didn’t bake all the way through, so when my Dad took a bite of one, he gagged delicately and made some feeble excuse for why he needed to rush to the kitchen. Mom was a brave soul and made it almost all the way through one before admitting defeat and declaring the texture “Plaster of Paris.” I likened it to either marzipan or dental mould.
Maybe I’ll get it right in time for Mother’s Day next year.]]>