Uncategorized

Only you can stop the Easter Slaughter

Posted by on Mar 20, 2013 in Featured, Uncategorized, What's New?

Only you can stop the Easter Slaughter

This is the Easter Bunny. It has a dark side; it eats kittens. Only by placing an order of Constance Cravings can you allay its terrible urgings for delicious kitten meat. For the sake of all that is furry and cute, please, place your order today!

Read More

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Joel!

Posted by on Jun 18, 2012 in Uncategorized

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Joel!

This handsome fellow is Joel, standing erect with his namesake batch of cookies: Uncle Joel’s Sportin’ Lumber. Yes, he’s the proud papa of this new concoction: 5th Avenue candy bars chopped up and smooshed into the dough, French’s Potato Sticks smashed on top and then baked to chewy, crispity, tumescent perfection. He’s a genius! You should try them! Just don’t say anything to him about his hair. He’s not fooling anyone, but we let him pretend anyway.

Read More

Almond SugarMoms

Posted by on Jun 18, 2012 in Featured, Seasonal Cookies, Uncategorized

Almond SugarMoms

What could be more refreshing and wholesome than a mouthful of Mom? Almond SugarMoms are the very embodiment of all that is wonderful about motherhood. They’re light, but firm; tender, but a little flaky; thin, yet weighty with responsibility (and butter). The almond flavoring gives them that delicious impression of marzipan without the guilt. Buy some for your dear mother, or get some for yourself and eat them over the sink at three in the morning while you brush crumbs off the oversized...

Read More

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Kasler!

Posted by on Jun 10, 2012 in Uncategorized, What's New?

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Kasler!

This gorgeous creature gently cupping her bountiful trays of deliciousness is Karen. She bought a tray of chocolate chip cookies for her husband, because she loves him. Do you love YOUR spouse this much? How do they know? Perhaps you should follow Karen’s fine example, hmm? Karen also purchased a tray of Satay Peanut Sauce cookies for her co-workers because they hate her. That’s what she said. Apparently, going three minutes too long makes your producer want to behead you with a...

Read More

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Walt!

Posted by on Jun 7, 2012 in Uncategorized, What's New?

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Walt!

This is Walt. Walt just made his girlfriend very happy. Yesterday, Walt’s girlfriend asked him to look at our site. He did and placed an order for Chocolate Chip and Kimbunserfuckers. Today, Walt picked up his orders and tonight, Walt will be getting some. Cookies. I mean, he’ll be getting to have some cookies. Tonight. After a sensible dinner…Oh, never mind.

Read More

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Gretchen!

Posted by on Jun 4, 2012 in Uncategorized, What's New?

Cavalcade of Cookie Stars-Gretchen!

Holy Crap, people! Gretchen placed the most AMAZING order! She ordered cookies for troop leaders, teachers, helpers–even her mom! Only one of these EIGHT trays was for her and her daughter. Look at her, lounging in all of her elfin glory, like a tiny Smaug guarding her delicious treasure. Yes, I’m mixing my Tolkien creatures in the same sentence. Fuck off. She’s cute and formidable is what I’m trying to say.

Read More