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Only you can stop the Easter Slaughter $

Only you can stop the Easter Slaughter

Only you can stop the Easter Slaughter

This is the Easter Bunny. It has a dark side; it eats kittens. Only by placing an order of Constance Cravings can you allay its terrible urgings for delicious kitten meat. For the sake of all that is furry and cute, please, place your order today!

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Only you can stop the Easter Slaughter

$

This is the Easter Bunny. It has a dark side; it eats kittens. Only by placing an order of Constance Cravings can you allay its terrible urgings for delicious kitten meat. For the sake of all that is furry and cute, please, place your order today!

Almond SugarMoms $12.00

Almond SugarMoms

Almond SugarMoms

Each order includes 16 delicious cookies. Currently, we only accept CASH and offer local pickup and delivery in the Columbus, Ohio area.
Fill out the form below to place your order.

Almond SugarMoms

$12.00

What could be more refreshing and wholesome than a mouthful of Mom? Almond SugarMoms are the very embodiment of all that is wonderful about motherhood. They’re light, but firm; tender, but a little flaky; thin, yet weighty with responsibility (and butter). The almond flavoring gives them that delicious impression of marzipan without the guilt. Buy some for your dear mother, or get some for...

Congratulations to our first victim–I mean, “customer”! $

Congratulations to our first victim–I mean, “customer”!

Congratulations to our first victim–I mean, “customer”!

[We] assure her that a breakfast and lunch of Constance Cravings cookies followed by a sensible dinner is a regimen supported by four of out five nutritionists.*

[wp_cart:Congratulations to our first victim–I mean, “customer”!:price::end]

Congratulations to our first victim–I mean, “customer”!

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Thanks to Haruna for being the gleeful recipient of the first online order of Constance Cravings cookings. Haruna ordered one of Curried Raisin Oatmeal & Pecan and one of Mayan Chocolate. We wish her many rainbow-farting unicorns, and assure her that a breakfast and lunch of Constance Cravings cookies followed by a sensible dinner is a regimen supported by four of out five...

Chocolate Chip Cookie $12.00

Chocolate Chip Cookie

Chocolate Chip Cookie

Each order includes 16 delicious cookies. Currently, we only accept CASH and offer local pickup and delivery in the Columbus, Ohio area.
Fill out the form below to place your order.

Chocolate Chip Cookie

$12.00

I really don’t like chocolate chip cookies. Neither do you; admit it. The vast majority of them are flabby puddles of tasteless dough with 4 or 5 chips gently sweating grease onto whatever tray of failure someone has chosen to display them. Those failure puddles are what started me on this little venture. I was determined to create a chocolate chip cookie that even I would like. I dorked...

O’Dell’s Monster $12.00

O’Dell’s Monster

O’Dell’s Monster

Each order includes 16 delicious cookies. Currently, we only accept CASH and offer local pickup and delivery in the Columbus, Ohio area.
Fill out the form below to place your order.

O’Dell’s Monster

$12.00

Brian O’Dell can sing. He can do many things very well: play the piano, program computers, arrange music, wear Spandex bike shorts… But most of all, he can sing. This cookie is inspired by Brian O’Dell’s voice and lovingly presented to you. It’s the incredible harmony of Peanut M&M’s blended with chocolate chip cookies. It’s like eating Brian’s...

Peanut Butter Cookie $12.00

Peanut Butter Cookie

Peanut Butter Cookie

Each order includes 16 delicious cookies. Currently, we only accept CASH and offer local pickup and delivery in the Columbus, Ohio area.
Fill out the form below to place your order.

Peanut Butter Cookie

$12.00

Who doesn’t like peanut butter? Besides Niels. But as I said, he’s Danish and simply doesn’t know any better. These are so good, you’ll be farting unicorns! These are baked with a sprinkling of kosher salt. They’re the right blend of tender and crumbly and break off into easy-to-eat, bite-size chunks. Good for eating all day. Wear stretchy pants and make sure the...